You Don't Need To Be A Math Genius

... to know that my latest number is kick ass!

3.5

Woo! Hoo! And that's after a week with no chemo. I'm convinced there's no rhyme or reason to two sets of numbers lately. A) the hCG and B) our tennis team ratings.

Two weeks after a hospital stay with 24 hours of Methotrexate dripping there's a decline to 5.1, then a slight uptick to 5.9, then a drop to 3.5 - go figure. But really, I'm not figuring, I'm just taking that number and running with it.

And apparently, no matter how much running you do up and down the tennis court to get the ball, the US Tennis Association will just make up your rating. After qualifying for the Regional Competition in Princeton this summer, some members of my tennis team got bumped up to 3.0 then recently bumped back down to 2.5. While it's a tennis bummer, I think the USTA secretly wants some of my girls to have a number in the 2's too. It seems to be the cool number to have. A little over two for them, and then a little under two for me. Besides, I haven't played tennis in so long, I'll be a 2.5 rating forever. I've got a lot of catching up to do - on the court and at the bar after the matches.

Medically, the number is down but so are my platelets. So I was disqualified from chemo for the second week. I get a little nervous when I can't get the juice. I'm afraid the number will go up ... but look at this week?? What do I know?? No chemo AND a better number AND I'm feeling more peppy and more like myself?? Not a bad gig.

I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I have to because this Groundhog Day will be 1 year since my re-diagnosis. That's a long time. A lot longer than I ever anticipated at the outset of this. But then again, a lot of this is different than my "expectations." And you can't really have expectations with cancer. It's gonna do what it's gonna do and you have to roll with it. I think that's a lesson God has probably been trying to instill in me through this whole thing. I think I'm just getting it now. Geez, am I stubborn.

It's my birthday at the end of the month. When I started this - the 3rd round of chemo - in October, I thought it would be great to be wrapped up by my birthday. It's clear that won't happen, but it's not such a bad thing. I will start my 33rd year sick and end it well. Maybe even with a baby in the works somehow or another. Think positive thoughts and positive things will come to you. And I'm thinking less than 2 is right around the corner, baby!

Happy New Year! Lucky '13 is gonna be our year!